Monday, January 28, 2008

Nanny Bliss (Updated)

I do so hate leaving my babies behind each morning, but my nanny makes it so much easier. Because seriously, do you know what my wondermous nanny said to me this morning when I asked her how her weekend was?? She said, "I missed the babies!"

I love her!


(this is my 250th post. I'm a total slacker. With 3 months on bed rest you'd think I'd have written a helluva lot more than that. Bad Blogger. Bad Blogger!)

Edited to Add: Just to clarify, I do not have guilt about working and leaving my children with a nanny. I am sad to leave my babies. I miss my children during the day. I wish I could spend the day with them every day. But I don't feel guilty about it. Guilt is born from knowing you're doing something wrong and I know I'm not doing anything wrong. I am doing what I have to do to provide for my family in the best way possible.

I receive a lot of caring, supportive anonymous comments, so I won't turn off anonymous commenting or move to a password-protected blog as some others have suggested. Nor will I delete offensive anonymous comments, because all the comments I get are a part of my blogging history and deserve to be preserved. But I would like to encourage my readers who don't have a blog account to leave comments using blogger's "nickname" feature. You don't have to use your real name or initials, just a consistent one. That way, I know you're a person who cares and not some meaningless troll like this insensitive pig who found his or her way into my blog today.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

glad her comment helped with your guilt....

Anonymous said...

Sounds like you've got yourself a winner! Mine says the same and she is truly incredible. :-)

Anonymous said...

Wow, that's pretty thoughtless (first comment).

Thank you for doing what you feel is best for your family. Seems like some parents only live for themselves.

megan said...

i'm sad you still have to defend yourself here. . .
i'm so glad to hear that your nanny is working out well.

Paulette said...

I have read your blog since the babies were born, and I am appauld that rude commentor even thinks it is any of there business how you live your life. Working is a personal comittment in each family, some families must have two incomes and not afforded the luxury to stay home. I was fortunate that I could but it certainly is none of anyones business what one's do in there families.
Perhaps this rude commentor just needs love, but oh it is hard to love the unlovely.
Your family is beautiful, I am proud of you.

Erin said...

Why in the world should you feel guilty about being a mom who works outside the home? I don't get that. Why do people think that it should be wrong to enjoy both being a mom and having a job? Then again, I'm a mom who works outside the home...

She sounds wonderful--I'm glad you've found her!

ms. c said...

I'm thrilled to hear that the nanny is working out!
Who wouldn't miss those 3 scrumptious faces everyday??!!

nickoletta100 said...

YAY for the wonderful Nanny! It must help with missing them, knowing the babies are being so well cared for. Boo to dumb anonymous commenters!

Jen said...

I am a lurker, but I absolutely love your blog.
I really hope that the nasty anonymous posters can move past 1960 and realize that it is normal and acceptable for a woman to work AND have a family.
Why would you feel guilty?

I'm glad she's working out!

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the trolls.

And I would love to be nanny to infant triplets - hard, definitely, but a unique position and lots of fun. Plus, you get to go home at night and SLEEP!

~ Jen

Kelli said...

sooo happy for you that you have such a wonderful nanny! I think that God puts people in our lives for a reason :-)

I LOVE the pictures you posted in your previous post....your babies are so darn cute!!!! so very very precious!

- Kelli

amazedlife said...

Oh, man. I'm not even trying to be a mom yet (not married and just finished law school) and I'm already annoyed with people who try to feed guilt to others about their choices as far as working or not. I nannied for two different families while I was in law school and I missed the kids every weekend, too! That's the best kind of nanny to have, I think.

Anonymous said...

I have to admit I'm a lurker, found you through "My Five Little Monkeys". I applaud you for standing up for your beliefs, what I don't understand is why it's so difficult for people to realize that it's no easier to go to work if you have one child or 3 children. Either way, you must do what is right for you, we would all love to be able to afford staying home with our kids and not having to work outside the home but as we know, that's not the way it works most times. Thanks again for allowing me to read your blog and keep up the good work! (No pun intended).

Tammy

Caba said...

Ugh. People are annoying. I love going to work everyday. I miss my kids like crazy. But I love my job.

Sometimes I think people just like to create drama. sucks that it's on your blog!

marion said...

Okay, this is bad of me, but I actually find the anonymous thing kind of...amusing. Not that anonymous is funny herself (himself?), but there's something about the "you're LEAVING YOUR BABIES OH NOEZ!!!" refrain that I find hilarious. One would think you were abandoning the babies on the doorstep of a haunted mansion, during a driving snowstorm, in the middle of the night, deep in the country. It's almost tragically poetic...or would be if we didn't have pictures of your warm, gurgling tykes all over the blog.

(Note: I am aware that babies are abandoned in real life. That is not funny - it's obviously genuinely tragic. It's the contrast here between the melodramatic accusations and the very different reality that I find amusing.)

Good luck with the new job...or, more accurately, the new jobs. Only one may bring monetary compensation, but they obviously both have many and varied rewards.

Rachel Inbar said...

That is so sweet. I think the way caregivers interact with parents is a significant part of the care. I know I always feel happier leaving my kids with someone who tells me about good things they've done rather than about how they whined when someone grabbed the ball from them or something like that...

Sounds like she's a gem :-)

Mindy said...

Karen, I love the way you described your feelings about heading off to work. It's exactly how I feel too, but I never would have thought to express it that way. Oh and congrats on the nanny, she sounds awesome and it must make the goodbyes a bit easier.

pam said...

oooh, does this nanny have a clone who lives in new orleans, maybe? if so, let me know. :D

Jody said...

You know what? The very best time in my first year was when I was sharing the workload with a mother's helper. The very best part of preschool was sharing my children with other loving adults who had a lot of great experience with kids and knew all sorts of new tricks and attitudes for dealing with mine. The very best way to raise kids, I start to believe, is as part of a team.

I'm really glad that your nanny is such a great partner/assistant to you and your husband in raising those adorable babies!

Anonymous said...

Going back to work is hard...some days are harder than others. When you have kids you make decisions that are best for your family. Just make sure your decision keep you sane. Working kept me sane but it also put food on the table.

Rose

littleangelkisses said...

WHAT the heck does that anonymous poster think? I mean really, working is NOTHING to be guilty about. Get a life Anon!

It sounds like you are incredibly lucky to have found such a caring nanny! YAY!

Suzanne said...

you know what i honestly think? anonymous idiots leave rude comments b/c they know it gets under your skin (the absurdity of it all) and that you will respond. they are just trying to get attention b/c they are pathetic. i ignore the jerks b/c that pisses them off even more sometimes. (that's why i LOVE reading YOUR responses to them! it is everything i WANT to say!) i'm glad you have a wonderful nanny! what a blessing! and i'm praying for your sweet little baby girl to get some chunk!

Anonymous said...

I am so glad that the nanny adores the babies and that you adore her.

Anonymous said...

oh my god people are rude you are doing a great job, I know it is gut wrentching everyday to leave your kids (i had to leave my boys to return to wrok when they were 6months and 18months old) it is never easy, i useded to cry the whole way to work, worry all day then love and squeeze them so tight when I would pick them up. I suffered severe post natal depression (our second son was a surprise - sorry to those who had trouble concieving, but I did whilst breastfeeding and on the Pill) I was 31/2 months pregnant with a 7 month old baby, no support, a husband who is fantastic but works with the Australian Army all of our family lives miles away. anyway sorry to go on, but work also gave me balance on the inside, I finally could talk about things other than poo, sleeping patterns and my well established routine. so do what you have to do and bugger the nasty ones. take care, hope Ellie starts fattening up. cheers Leonie from AUs xx

Anonymous said...

I cannot belive the drama over you returning to work, i can only imagine how hard it is to leave your babies but they also need a roof over there heads and food on the table.
You amaze me with your parenting skills (the breastfeeding for example) and have nothing to feel guilty about

Heidi said...

Just wanted to show my support. It sounds like you have a fantastic Nanny!